When I see candy corn, it’s like a switch flips in my skull, and all bets are off! Picture this: I’m Skeleton Sam, the suave and spooky specter, but the mere sight of those tri-colored kernels sends me into a frenzy of delight. I start doing candy corn cartwheels down the street, my red headphones bouncing in time with my antics. I dive headfirst into any candy corn pile I find, emerging with pieces stuck between my bones, looking like a candy corn porcupine.
But wait, it gets crazier! I’ve been known to scale buildings just to get a better view of candy corn displays in store windows. Once, I even orchestrated an elaborate candy corn heist, complete with skeleton stealth and ghostly getaway plans. I’ve replaced my morning coffee with a candy corn smoothie, and I’ve been caught using candy corn as confetti for impromptu dance parties.
I talk to candy corn as if they were my loyal minions, commanding them to march into my mouth in perfect formation. And let’s not forget my candy corn art sessions—I’ve created entire murals out of those sugary delights, only to devour my masterpiece in a matter of minutes.
So, when I say I get crazy over candy corn, believe me, the antics are truly insane. There’s no limit to the lengths I’ll go to for those deliciously addictive treats!
Skeleton Sam Ranks Candy Corn Flavors
Classic candy corn will always have my heart, but candy makers keep dreaming up new flavors. I’ve tasted them so you don’t have to. Here’s my official, totally unbiased ranking. (Flavors come and go each year, so grab your favorites while you can.)
- 1. Classic: the original honey-vanilla kernel. Undefeated.
- 2. Caramel Apple: like a fall fair in a candy.
- 3. Pumpkin Spice: it was always going to happen, and I’m glad it did. Pum pum pum pum pumkin!
- 4. S’mores: campfire vibes, no marshmallow sticks required.
- 5. Cupid Corn: the Valentine’s version in red, pink and white. A romantic choice for me and Seraphina.
- 6. Reindeer Corn: red, green and white for the holidays. Proof candy corn isn’t just for October.
- 7. Birthday Cake: sweet on sweet, and somehow it works.
- 8. Green Apple: tart, bright and a little wild.
- 9. Carrot Cake: green and orange. Bold. I respect it.
- 10. Turkey Dinner: a Thanksgiving dinner in candy form. I’m a skeleton, so I don’t have much of a stomach for it, and neither do most people.
What’s your number one? I’ll be over here eating my way back to the top of the list.
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